If I Can’t Be Your Wife

Peter hastily followed after him, but the red cloak was moving away.
Peter paused, pondering Alexis’ words, and then turned away.

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“Your Highness, where are you going?”

“I’m going to the Empress’ Palace.”

“Pardon? Your Highness, are you serious?”

 

Knowing what the situation would be like, the chief aide, who was about to ask if he meant that he was going there now, hurriedly followed the prince without hesitation.

 

***

 

The Empress’ Palace was a mess, as expected.
As soon as Peter entered, he stepped on a broken teacup.

 

“Mother.”

“Peter!”

 

The maids who were begging and clinging to the Empress showed relieved faces when they saw Peter.
With a hardened face, he beckoned the maids to leave.

 

“I have something to ask you.”

“An arranged marriage! What happened?”

“Calm down and sit.”

 

It had been less than an hour since the court meeting ended, and it seemed that the whole story had already reached the Empress’ palace.
Peter sighed deeply and sat down at the tea-stained table.
The Empress began to speak in an agitated tone.
It was before she could even speak her words.

 

“Do I look like I’m going to calm down? Prince Walten must be doing this to corner you!”

“Nothing has been confirmed yet.
I have no intention of resolving this matter with marriage.”

“Of course you shouldn’t.
How could we possibly introduce more dirty blooded immigrants to the Imperial Family? Walten is already flowing with such.”

“Mother! Please mind your words.”

 

The maids had already left and only the two of them remained in the bedroom, but Peter tried to stop the Empress.
She felt sorry for her mother, who was easily agitated to the point that it was close to an illness as she suffered from anxiety all the time.
However, she also felt sorry for Alexis.

 

Although angry with him due to the incident with Kathleen, Peter still did not want her brother, Alexis, to be treated less than a human being by her mother.

 

“At the next meeting, Marquis Ostaver will stand by your side.”

 

The Empress, who had been wheezing for a long time, said with a sharpness in her eyes.

 

“Send Walten down South again.”

“That doesn’t make sense.
Southern immigrants are already the people of the Empire, so why should brother fight there? How can we say that the Imperial Family is directly subduing the people?”

“So? Send him.
Walten has lived too long.
It’s time for him to die.”

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“Mother!”

“Why aren’t you listening to me!”

 

The Empress flashed a furious expression and came closer to grab her shoulders tightly then slapped her.

 

“What are you going to do if he finds out that you’re a woman? Do you think you can still hide it when there are even talks of an arranged marriage? If not this time, we will soon hear voices of doubt roaring around asking why you won’t even be engaged when you’re already an adult.
Do you think Walten will stand still?”

“Still, I can’t send him to the battlefield again!”

 

Peter confronted the Empress’ eyes and protested.

 

“It can be resolved peacefully.
There is no need to sacrifice brother again.”

“Why don’t you understand that as soon as it is revealed that you are a princess, the illegitimate b*stard must disappear for you to keep your life?”

 

The Empress gritted her teeth and said.
Her hand gripped Peter’s shoulder and tightened.

 

“I have to do something before he participates.
How lucky that lowly guy is, and even after rolling into the battlefield, his tough life still didn’t end… If he had just taken a little more back then, it would have been over.
”

“Over?”

 

Peter, finding something strange in her mother’s words, cut her off.

 

“What do you mean?” (Peter)

“Didn’t Walten tell you?”

 

The Empress smiled, her lips shaking.
Peter got up from her seat and grabbed her mother’s arm and asked earnestly.

 

“What have you been hiding from me? My brother went to the battlefield when I was young.
I thought… Only when he makes a contribution can he receive the title of Duke as a collateral of the Imperial Family.
Are you saying mother tried to kill older brother?”

“He has been consuming southern scorpion venom since he was six years old.
But he’s still not dead.”

 

The Empress shook Peter’s hand away.
Peter was at a loss for words at the attitude of her mother, who showed no signs of guilt.

 

“The poison gradually paralyzes the brain, killing emotions.
In the end, it leaves nothing but slaughter interesting.
Such a role was perfect for a rag with the blood of a southern foreigner.
To subdue the rebels for the Imperial Family and die heroically.”

“Mother!”

“It was all for you!”

 

Peter was at a loss for words at her mother’s evil eyes.
The Empress, who had already lost her reason, could not hear the words of her child.

 

“It was a good ending for him.
If only he died there according to my plan! At that time, the South was a place where sane people could not survive.
He also rebelled at first, but after realizing his plight, he ate the poison with his own hands.
I thought he was so addicted that he was going crazy… Filthy b*stard.
He was determined to live.
He should have died before His Majesty the Emperor summoned him, ha ha ha …….
things got messed up.”

“Oh my world… Mother, what the hell have you done?”

 

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Peter’s eyes widened at her mother’s wretchedness.

 

Peter was five years old when her mother first brought her new brother before her, Alexis.
They said he decided to join the war.

Peter was thirteen when her half-brother successfully suppressed the rebellion of the immigrants in the South.
After that long period of time, he returned home and was called the Envoy of War.

 

Peter, who had always had a complex from the fact that she was not born a man, was envious and respectful of her 25-year-old half-brother, who was awarded the title of Duke of Walten after completing his military service.

 

Therefore, despite her mother’s objections, she secretly hung around him.
When he got married three years later, she gained another family member she could call her sister-in-law, so she stuck even closer because she was happy for him.

 

‘He must have thought I was deceiving him.’

 

Her brother never told her, so she didn’t know.
Had she known that her mother had done such a thing, she would not have dared to do it.

 

No, he wouldn’t have been able to.

 

Peter involuntarily grabbed her cramped chest and begged.

 

“Mother, brother has no interest in the throne.
Even if I tell him my secret, he won’t rebel.”

“Don’t say things you know nothing about!”

 

The Empress cut her words like a single slash of a sword and said.

 

“You can’t.
Even if he’s not really interested in the Emperor’s position, knowing your secret will change his mind.
You can’t.”

“Why do you think I can’t?”

 

She was resentful.

Peter was always resentful of her mother’s words.
From an early age, she relentlessly tried to show that even a woman could become an Emperor.
If anyone who didn’t know the secret saw her, she was now a person who would be called the perfect prince, but she still couldn’t figure out why it couldn’t be done.

 

The Empress spoke quickly.

 

“Trivellian will collapse without two or more men of Imperial blood.
Literally, the land will collapse.”

“What? What are you saying?”

“It is an oracle that has been passed down since the founding of the country.
The land splits, the rivers overturn, and the mountains fall.
Do you think you will be able to rule properly then? When His Majesty the Emperor dies, it’s over! So, never reveal your secret.
Just stay still, let him sire a child, then bring the child under you.”

“Ha….”

 

Her mind was dizzy.
Peter didn’t want to believe it, but after hearing her mother’s words, something crossed her mind.

 

His Majesty the Emperor’s deteriorating condition.

Earthquakes of unknown causes started from the lowest parts of the Imperial Territory and had been rising.
As a result, a large number of poor people were heading to the capital, causing problems.
And, as opposed to hating her older brother, the mother who longed for his successor…

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“Do my words sound like a lie?”

 

The Empress smiled and looked at her daughter’s face in shock.

 

“Then don’t believe it.
Pretend you don’t know.
This mother will take care of everything.
I’ll use more dr*gs to make Walten…”

“No, mother.
Don’t do that anymore.”

 

Peter slapped her mother’s hand caressing her shoulder.

 

“I would rather confess to my brother.”

“Even though I’ve told you everything, why are you so stubborn!”

 

The Empress began to get furious again.

 

“If the nobles find out about the oracle hidden by the Imperial Family, they will bring us down and raise him to the throne, even if they dislike Prince Walten! Do you want that?”

“I don’t want to win the throne if I have to kill my brother.”

“What!”

“I will become the Emperor as my mother wishes.
You don’t have to worry about that.
So please, get some rest.”

 

The Empress grabbed the back of her neck and collapsed.
Her body was already not in very good condition, but she got upset.
Peter quickly took her to her bed, laid her down, and called her maids.

 

“Your Majesty, Empress!”

“Call the Imperial Doctor.”

 

She looked down at her mother with a sorrowful heart.

 

“And don’t let her out until she is fully recovered.”

“Yes, Your Highness.”

“If the nobles ask for an audience, let me know right away.”

 

She could never obey her mother’s terrible words.
By now it was too late to ask forgiveness for her mother’s deeds, the least she could do was to stop her from committing any more sins.

 

After seeing the imperial doctor arrive and give treatment, Peter left the palace.

 

‘First, I need to figure out what’s happening with the earthquake.
And then I’ll go see brother…’

 

When the thought reached that point, Peter who was walking stopped.

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-The poison gradually paralyzes the brain, killing emotions.
In the end, it leaves nothing but slaughter interesting.

 

Her mother said her older brother had been poisoned since he was six years old.
He was seventeen when he went to battle.
He was twenty-one when he returned.

 

‘Then for 15 years.’

 

She couldn’t breathe.
He had been taking poison for so long that it made him feel nothing except when he killed.

 

Alexis Walten’s behavior, which had always been unreasonable and cold to his wife, may not have been intentional.

 

Peter sighed heavily.
It felt like the ground she was standing on was collapsing and stifling her breath.

 

***

 

After returning to the Duke’s residence, Alexis summoned Emily and the child again.
To make it difficult for Kathleen to find him, the child was changing residences every day.

 

“Master, I have brought him.”

“Did anything happen?”

 

He asked as he took the child and hugged him.
The child smiled softly and spread his arms toward Alexis.

 

Seeing this child made him feel really strange.
He couldn’t explain it, but it didn’t feel unpleasant.

 

“Yes, he slept well and ate well, Master.
But……”

“But, what?”

“Madame is suffering a lot.”

 

Emily hesitated, then she plucked up the courage.

 

“As the Master said, she ate well and did not jump or try to run away.
However, since the Young Master isn’t there, she keeps worrying and crying and can’t sleep.”

“……”

“It’s presumptuous of me but…..
can’t we let Madame take care of Young Master?”

 

Alexis quietly looked down at the child’s face.
His face that had a bright smile on it resembled her.

 

After a while, he opened his mouth.

 

“Go get Kathleen.”